In this moment, how can I appreciate all that is? My mind is focused on what I hope will happen
in the near future. My ears are
straining to hear the news about the change that is coming, is in fact here, I hope. My eyes look for the signs that my hoped for
future is beginning.
Many of my thoughts are already living there, planning how
it will proceed, what it will look like and how it will unfold, how to prepare
for it, what I need to do to be ready.
After all, there was that promise, indication, feeling,
sense that God was doing this leading, this new thing. I should be like the ant of Proverbs chapter
6. Nothing slows down the ant, even the
lack of a leader does not stymie his efforts to provide for himself. The ant
will be ready for whatever happens in the time ahead!
Preparing for the
future I am hoping will come; I am always looking forward, beyond the
horizon. And, believe me, that is a
difficult sight to see, because anything beyond the horizon is not visible to
me, the angle of sight does not allow it.
Yet, I strain to make it out, to discern its shape, as if my seeing
causes it to happen.
How then to focus on the moment in which I can see without
straining; that present time in which I
do not have to strain to hear? In Jen
Wilkin’s book None Like Him, she cites Psalm 131 as a beginning.
My heart is not proud, Lord,
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things too wonderful for me.
2 But I have calmed and quieted myself,
I am like a weaned child with its mother;
like a weaned child I am content.
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things too wonderful for me.
2 But I have calmed and quieted myself,
I am like a weaned child with its mother;
like a weaned child I am content.
3 Israel , put your hope in
the Lord
both now and forevermore.
both now and forevermore.
Having all it needs met; the child in her mother’s arms
rests content. The mother is protecting,
leading and caring for the young child.
The need to see what is ahead is dispensed with as it is the responsibility
of the mother, not the child.
But note also that the speaker of the psalm has worked to
calm and quiet himself. This is the
beginning of being in the present moment.
Being aware of the need to calm down, to quiet oneself, to focus on who
is leading you, who is carrying you, who is caring for you; therein lays the
source of the contentment: Contentment like that of a fully satisfied and loved
child.
Living in the present, in the given moment of my existence
is going to be a behavior I will have to learn.
I think the child in her mother’s arms is the place to start, being
aware of all that is here in this moment and savoring it to the full, and being
aware that the One who leads me will do so at the perfect time. Meanwhile, let me rest, content.